Last week my husband and I watched a movie that starred one of our favorite actresses--Ann Hathaway. When we sat down to watch, we expected a romantic comedy. It was much more.
At first we were shocked and disappointed. It contained a lot of profanity, nudity and gratuitous sex. I almost turned it off, but something kept me watching. I think I was hoping for something valuable because it was a Ann Hathaway movie. And I'd never watched one of her movies that I didn't like.
As it turned out, she didn't let me down. Her performance was excellent and believable. She played the role of a woman stricken with early onset Parkinsons Disease. The gauntlet of physical challenges threatened to destroy her. The challenges and fears playing out on the screen struck very close to home for me. Some scenes could have come from my own life. I was startled by statements coming out of the character's mouth--they were things that I've said, verbatim.
Anne's character, Maggie, longs for independence, hates pity and needs to be loved--but she goes about working through these issues in all the wrong ways. When Maggie comes upon a a young pharmaceutical rep. named Jamie, played by Jake Gyllenhaal, she's met her match..
If she were my daughter I would have told her to run from the self-absorbed young man. Jamie has never told anyone or anything that he loves them--because he hasn't. He's committed only to himself. That is until he actually falls in love.
When the movie came to an end, my husband and I looked at one another, our eyes brimming with tears. In so many ways this was our story--not the issues about not being able to love, but so many of the other challenges this couple faced. There were no easy answers, only a pledge to stand together against the odds.
In 1991 I was involved in an auto accident with a log truck loaded with timber. I've never been the same. Some of my injuries never healed and sometimes I feel like I've been old since age thirty-nine, which is the age I was the day of the accident. Chronic pain changes a person. Some days I am not easy to live with. : \
Up until that time, I'd taken my husband's love for granted. I didn't realize how deep his commitment was until he had to step into a bigger role than "just" husband. Not only did he have to fulfill his traditional place as breadwinner, but he also became housekeeper, cook, full time parent and at times, med-aid. He did it and still does without complaint. And up until then we'd lived an active life together. Our activities were greatly diminished and with the passing years even more so.
I'll be honest--I miss those days. I mourn their loss. And it's because of that loss that sometimes I feel like my husband would be better off with an able-bodied woman for a wife. I feel bad about the many things we can't do together. But my husband has never wavered in his devotion. Even as I am, he loves me and wants to spend his life with me. If I could go back and change the events of June 11, 1991 I would. I'm not courageous enough to embrace the changes in me. But, I am grateful to have experienced true love and to know what it really looks like. Thank you, Lord.
Sometimes I am awed by the fact that my husband loves me just as I am. And I love him so deeply for loving me.His love reminds me of Christ's love for the church. We love Him because He first loved us . . . just as we are.
I'm not telling you to go out and get this movie and watch it. Many of you reading this would be offended by its content. But I wanted to share with you what a wonder it is to discover treasure in unexpected ways and unexpected places.
Love & Other Drugs reminded me how blessed I am to be loved just as I am.
Grace and peace to you from God,
Bonnie
